9.04.2004

what's the rush, dip your brush into this twilight...there are leaves upon the skylight, trace your hand, trace your hand...

...mr. red, he shot ahead, he shot ahead inside a circle...on a bad day, who would you kill, take a stand, trace your hand...

yesterday, i left work and went and had a stiff drink at taco mac, (lemondrop martini), then went to the grocery where i needed to pee a lot, and felt my alcohol, and actually forgot some of the crucial things i was there to buy (bug spray - you can't go outside without it here, cigarrettes (i only had 2 left), and a dustpan (i broke the other one the night before)....so then i go home, and as i dash around trying to get things at least presentable, i get frustrated at bob because he doesn't call and give me information regarding his mother's arrival, and he also doesn't understand that i've had to re-align my entire evening and night....which normally i wouldn't mind but i'm behind in accounting and have to be prepped for monday's meeting with my group....all i wanted from him was a hand and a little acknowledgment....not "mom doesn't care if the house is dirty." well, yeah...i know. but mom is also not going to come into a house that has no food (except jell-o pudding snacks...you at least have to have some basics when an out-of-town guest arrives), and they need somewhere to sleep - which entailed converting jelena's study into the guest bedroom that it also is - you've got to put sheets on the bed, set out linens, you know...the basics....i wasn't looking to have an immaculate house, but i at least had to have it presentable....*sigh*...bob didn't get it and i was too frustrated to try and convey it anyway. so, getting closer to the point...i finally have to call his sister to get her to get mom's information (b/c bob also did not leave me with mom's #)....and i find out that she'll be arriving in less than an hour...ok...so turn on the speed...get everything tidied and sheeted, and then i take the dogs on a walk...poor girls...i felt bad that i hadn't taken them out right when i got home. so on our walk, this dog decides, from across it's yard and inside it's screened porch, that it hates ubu, so it busts out of the porch and runs down to the sidewalk and beats the shit out of her. it was horrible...she was screaming, i was trying to hit the dog (a really big boxer looking like thing) and the owner tore out and tackled the dogs and eventually got her dog off ubu. ubu was crying and rolling over on her back submissive and just being wretched for several minutes...i've never seen her do anything like it. well, we figure that she's ok after a cursory examination...no blood or anything and the lady is really nice and i go on down to the store where i buy an entire box of treats for ubu and a squeaky toy (which neither dog knows what to do with) and i get a lottery ticket for her to fund a doggie dream vacation b/c i feel so bad (i didn't win) and i get the bug spray and the people at the store give me some treats b/c they feel bad that my dog's traumatized. and then i go back outside and notice 1 puncture wound on her back. shit. so i go home and call kat who gives me an entire list of things to do - #1 clip the whole area for 4 inches around the puncture....so i get off the phone with her, call bob, who finally answers and is giving mom instructions to get to the house and ask him to call me back. he does, i tell him what happens and he says he'll be home asap. so i start to clip ubu. an hour later with some help from mom and about half the box of treats gone, we have 5 puncture wounds. not 1. one won't stop bleeding and we finally get it to clot. so poor dog. we had to take her to the vet this morning. and they doped her up and she still can't function 5 hours later - poor poor dog. i feel so bad for her. and the strangest part is, yesterday at work andrea and i were talking about her scout and how she hadn't eaten in a day and a half (and this dog loves her food) and not even human food would tempt her....so then i was saying that she should take her to the vet and that it was strange how when it was other people's animals i was fine with their pain, etc...could probably even operate on a friend's animal and be fine...i'm the one that gets called to come over and clip nails for the dogs that scream bloody murder, etc...and i said, it's a good thing neither of my dogs have ever been hurt (even though ubu had heart worms but that wasn't hurg)....b/c i'm not sure how i'd deal with it. so, i think i jinxed poor ubu. nothing but good things to say about them from here on out. ok. so now i have to go across the street and give the neighbors the vet bill and tell them it wasn't as minor as we thought...i almost feel bad....how's that?

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quotation of the moment

- "that's what it's all about - full circle moments and recreating within yourself what you've lost."-

jelena

i like to pretend that this is my own little world - that no one can come in unless i open the door. hence, the random snippets of my life and thoughts...

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