4.08.2005

can't see 'em...for the glow of the neon lights....

i am deep-down, bone tired. some of you know, but for those who don't...today was not a great day. this morning, as i'm feeding dakota so that i can give her the antibiotic and her pain killer, sushi jumps up on the counter and eats the 50 mg rimadyl meant for the 60-something pound dog. i instantly grab my phone and call pets are people too and 40 seconds later kat is on the phone and telling me to get sushi in there now. so i grab him, grab shoes, and sprint out the door, barely leaving bob a note "call me" b/c he had gone to the gas station. we got to the vet 18 minutes after sushi had ingested the meds and they took him off in the back....after about 25 minutes, they come out and tell me he's already puked for the first time (they had to give him an injection) and then kat comes and tells me that she's going to give him another injection and then give him liquid charcoal and that they have to keep him at least until the early afternoon. so i head home. i get there, decide i cannot leave dakota at home today b/c she hyperventilates and panics when i try to put on the radar collar, so i determine that she's going to have to go to work with me and let me take care of her while i'm there. so i change out of my pajama shirt and head to the office. we get a call from kat about 12:30 and she's talked to pfizer (the pharmaceutical company that produces rimadyl) and they have no information on cats b/c it's made for dogs and they haven't tested it on cats so they refer her to the national poison control for animals. so she calls them and the woman she speaks with tells her that a trace amount of rimadyl is lethal for cats and that kidney failure and GI blisters are the symptoms that will occur. she says he needs to be on an IV for 24-48 hours, must be given the liquid charcoal and that maybe he'll be ok. so kat tells me that this woman really scared her about it and that she's worried...however she says that i got him there fast enough and it looked like he puked it up before it really got ingested and she said that he took the liquid charcoal better than any other cat she's ever given it to (small comfort for me). she thinks he's going to be ok. but the symptoms show up anywhere up to 12 hours after ingestion. so sushi is still at the vet. he may get to come home tomorrow. i can't quite believe that he may still not pull through this. i'm also afraid of what the vet bill is going to be...i'm estimating close to $500...which would put our two-day grand total in the vicinity of $1,200. but it doesn't matter. if i'd gotten him there even 25 minutes later, sushi would not be alive right now. lesson learned - it only takes 6 seconds of your back turned for horrendous things to occur.

on a better note, dakota was an angel at work. i took her off the leash and she slept next to me and followed me to the break room and then would lead me back to my desk - she learned where my desk was really quick!! and after sleeping in the bed with her all night on a leash that i held (which meant i didn't really sleep so much as i had to wake up constantly to make sure she wasn't scratching and that i still had the leash), we're pretty attached at the hip. it was hard to leave her tonight to go to sugarland...that and the fact that i had to put four socks on her feet b/c she had another panic attack when i tried the radar collar again. i am so relieved that i came home to find her with her stitches still in both her eyes.

sugarland was great. as was the snipped of shawn mullins we heard on the way in. also, this woman gayell performed after sugarland and i liked her music (except when our ear drums were almost busted). now, i'm going to try to breathe. and maybe process what's gone on in the last 24 hours...it feels like i can finally let myself take it all in...

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- "that's what it's all about - full circle moments and recreating within yourself what you've lost."-

jelena

i like to pretend that this is my own little world - that no one can come in unless i open the door. hence, the random snippets of my life and thoughts...

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